Today is Bret's birthday. Because it's his birthday, I'm not gonna call him The Bish here. Because of his birth date, his dad often reminds us of what was going on the day he was born. It was a historic presidential election and Johnson tromped all over Goldwater, with fear mongering in my opinion. Politics don't change.
I met the dear husband when I lived in the BYU 10th ward. He had moved up to Utah after his mission to attend BYU and had been working and living with his aunt and uncle. I was good friends with his former friend from EAC, Kent Applegate, and he came to visit Kent. Kent encouraged him to move into the ward. I met him the day all that was going on and I'm pretty sure that after seeing me, he KNEW he had to move in. :-) And he did. A little house on the corner right up the street.
I'm not sure if I have a picture of him from back then with his full mustache and hair parted down the middle, but I thought he was cute. Long story short, it took about 10 months before I saw his true value enough to start thinking about a future, especially since I had a mission call to Sao Paulo Brazil. I'm a slow learner sometimes. It also took a tragedy for me to really see the depth of his character and appreciate him fully. (The tragedy was my dear Grampy's death).
More than 23 years later, I know I did not realize the gem of a person I was marrying. You know the saying, "still waters run deep." I think that best characterizes my sweetheart. He is very still. It's rare to see him get upset about things even though he can have strong opinions. He rarely gets impatient, although the children have pushed him over the edge a few times. He has never yelled at me. Not once. He has raised his voice a time or two. We have NEVER been in a fight. Not the way I define them. There have been disagreements, but no fights.
I've learned a lot from my dear companion. I think one of his greatest strengths is his ability to hold his tongue. Even when I want to fight, ie "come on, put 'em up." Ok, no fists. He will not engage in a conversation that is going in that direction. He is quick to forgive and to ask to be forgiven, when maybe he wasn't the one needing to ask. He is very wise. It's the whole still thing. He may look still, but his mind is not. I am often humbled by his advice and the way he has thought things through, when it is my tendency to open my mouth and let whatever is there fall out. Although, I am learning from him to do better.
Is he perfect? Heck no! Just last week I was angry with him for 6 days because of something he said. Uh oh, I might have to explain that now. He has his weaknesses which I will not elaborate on. And we have our personal struggles that we are still trying to work through and some days feel as if they will overwhelm us. But, when I think back on all the different types of young men I could have married, it kind of scares me to think where I'd be because of my unique personality, if I'd married anyone else.
He supports me in everything I do. If there is anything I want that we can make happen and there is no good reason why I should not be able to attempt it, he is right there with me. Right there behind me. Like classes, and trips, and races, and elections. He allows me the growth that I am seeking. He champions our children. He is an example to them and they look up to him. Every day he blesses my life even though I am ashamed to admit, I don't always see it.
So, if you happen to run into The Bish today, wish him a Happy Birthday. He sure deserves it. Happy Birthday Bret. I love you.
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